I would say for about two years almost every day I woke up with
Matthew 6:34 in my head. I would hear this verse over and over again in
my head. It felt as if God was stuck on repeat, because this is basically
all He said to me during that time.
I would go to church, and hear that verse, I would watch a
Christian based television program and hear that verse, everywhere I went this
verse would chase me down. I finally got the point, that maybe if this
verse has decided to attach itself to me; maybe I should do what it’s telling
me to do.
Verse 6:33 in Matthew tells us But seek (aim at and strive
after) first of all His kingdom and His righteousness (His way of doing and
being right), and then all these things taken together will be given you besides.
In my own limited perspective and view point, I truly thought I
was seeking God. I thought that I was putting in the effort that I needed
to have the relationship with Him that I wanted. Little did I know God
had something else in mind? I was resistant to this verse, because,
I thought I already had a good relationship with God, and I was very content
and comfortable, with where I was.
I was happy living my life as a Luke warm Christian.
(Gasp) Imagine my surprise when I stumbled across the verse that tells us
that God takes issue with the Luke warm Christian. I thought I was being
obedient! I thought I was earning my gold star, while maintaining the
lifestyle I was also comfortable in. Basically, I was straddling the fence
of being a Jesus freak and being a worldly person.
It’s not possible to be both… something is going to have to shift
and change, and change it did.
Slowly, I started to lose my friends, first the surface friends,
that I would casually socialize with and then one by one, I started losing my
inner circle of friends. I didn’t really notice nor should I say
acknowledge this until a couple weeks ago, after the death of one of my
closest friends.
My desires in life also started to change, while I was losing my
friends. I no longer really wanted to be the person in the bar, or at a
party, and wanted to be at home. I started reading and spending time
learning about God and developing a deeper relationship with Him.
All of this was happening and I didn’t even realize it.
I didn’t connect the constant repeat of Matthew 6:33 in my head, with the
slow dissolution of the person I knew myself to be. God was
changing me slowly without me even realizing I was changing.
When we desire to seek God, seek the life that God has for us, the
decisions that God would want us to make, and the decisions that Jesus made, means we
have to change. There is no way to remain the same person, while your
mind is being renewed.
That would be like taking a piece of paper, cutting it up into
little pieces, and still insisting that the paper is still the same.
Yes, it’s still paper but it’s not one piece of paper; you now have many small
pieces of paper.
I am still a person; I still battle with problems in life. I
still make wrong decisions, and sin daily. But yet at the same time,
I am not the same. I want different things in life than I did even a year
ago. I want to help people more than I did before; I want to understand
people’s stories more than I did before. I want to extend my hand in
service or prayer, in ways I never did before. My heart has been opened
to people around me and my heart has been softened, so I am not as hard and
judgmental as I was before.
Now, God knows, as well as I do, that I have a far way to travel,
but all of these things have taken place without me even trying to
change. All of these things happened because God kept reminding me where
my priority in life needed to be, and that was seeking Him.
I was no longer to seek Him for things. I was no longer just
asking Him to fulfill my fleshly needs but I was asking Him to use me in His
Kingdom. To change me into the person that He created me to be. I
was now asking for help for other people and to show me how I can be
used.
I was now searching for God, for His qualities, for His face,
not for His hand, and what He can give me.
It changed my relationship with God. It changed my
relationship with other people and it changed my relationship with
myself. My relationship with God became deeper and no longer
surface. He began revealing to me His plans for my life, not my plans,
but His plans for my life.
When I decided to give in to verse 6:33 and to do what God has
been calling me to do for over two years, I saw a change in everything around
me. Now, I don’t want to give the impression that life is rainbows
and butterflies, because it hasn’t all been easy. This has been a
very challenging, emotional and sometimes lonely process. But I
know I am doing what God has called me to do.
While things are changing and shifting, there are new things being
birthed into my life. There are new friendships forming, new dreams,
hopes and desires that are coming. There is new life beginning to shape
and sprout in the midst of the death of who I used to be.
When we are called to seek God, and truly seek Him, we need to be
prepared for the changes that are going to happen in us. We need to know
that yes, we are being obedient to the call of God but at the same time we are
now denying our flesh, and that is going to hurt. It is going to be
uncomfortable to you, your flesh and maybe even the people around you.
But we have a promise, a silver lining if you will, and that is
the last sentence of this verse. And then all these things taken together
will be given you besides. God promises you, that when you seek Him
for who He is, and what He wants to do in your life; He will reward you by
giving you everything He has.
There are many peaks and valleys when you are changing into the
image of Christ. There are many adjustments and questions to what is
happening, and why, but the one thing that we know is the entire time; God is
walking right with us. God is the one who is opening our eyes to the
things that need to change, and He will do this in the time that is perfect for
you.
God will take you by the hand and walk in front of you as you
enter into a new relationship with Him. He will kindly make the way for
you and try to ease your pain as much as possible, while going through the hard
days. He will open doors that no man can open and I promise you He
will close doors that no man can close.
If we allow God to truly work in our lives and change us into His
image, we are guaranteed to have a life that was more fulfilling and joyful
then the life we had before seeking Him.
Remember God doesn’t call you to do anything that you are not
prepared to do, through Him, so when He starts to play Matthew 6:33 on repeat
in your life know that you are ready for it. You are prepared for this
season in your life, and that you will be rewarded for it in the end!
Matthew 6:33 But seek (aim at and strive after) first of all
His kingdom and His righteousness (His way of doing and being right), and then
all these things taken together will be given you besides.
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